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  • #228180

    duncanich
    Member

    Hi all,
    Kind of a romance-related question. Starting seeing a Brazilian guy in his 30s and it’s at the lame stage of “we’re more than friends” but he isn’t willing to commit to more. So, the other day, his BFF requested to be my friend on Fbook. I’ve never met this friend.
    I thought it was odd. My Brazilian friends here are divided. Some think it’s odd and some think it’s normal. I am not sure what to do. Any ideas?
    Thanks!

  • #228184

    NYesq
    Member

    I have 2 thoughts on this. First thing I have noticed is that all my Brasilian friends on FB seem to have 100’s if not 1000’s of friends on FB. If they even hear your name, they add you. No big deal.
    On the other hand, Brasilian men tend to be excessively
    jealous, even if they are not emotionally committed all
    the way. It may be just another pair of eyes watching your moves on FB.
    Personally, if I do not know the person nor have I met the person I just ignore it. I would think, if it is becoming serious, it is time to meet his BFF.

  • #228187

    beach bum
    Member

    I think you’re thinking about it too much. Just make a decision and go about with your life.

  • #228189

    doctorlili
    Member

    I think you should not let the fear of jealousy be a concern. Let him be jealous. And if your intentions are to jump ship, do it with gusto. You only have one life and it ain’t playing on Facebook.

  • #228216

    [QUOTE=KSaudades] So, the other day, his BFF requested to be my friend on Fbook. I’ve never met this friend. [/QUOTE]
    People still do FB?!? Confused

  • #228221

    agri2001
    Participant

    [QUOTE=Gringo.Floripa][QUOTE=KSaudades] So, the other day, his BFF requested to be my friend on Fbook. I’ve never met this friend. [/QUOTE]
    People still do FB?!? Confused
    [/QUOTE]
    Yes.. 12 and 14 year old`s or at least the ones that have the maturity of that age group.
    Or the ones that want their data being mined by Zucker and helping him get even richer. It`s one or the other.

  • #228222

    815
    Member

    I think it is 100% normal. Brazilians have some weird social networking habits and one is “collecting” friends as if he who has the highest friend count wins something at the end.
    edit: I second the advice to ignore and go on with your daily grind. Paulistano USA2012-12-01 09:36:19

  • #228236

    NYesq
    Member

    [/QUOTE]Yes.. 12 and 14 year old`s or at least the ones that have the maturity of that age group.[/QUOTE]
    I disagree. It is a great social medium for those that know it is impossible to keep in constant contact with all their friends. It really isn’t much different than what we are doing on this forum. I get daily updates and advice and pleas for help from friends and family at home or traveling the world including photos. I get clips of movies they are recommending, are in or producing, music they are listening to or performing and even the little things like photos of the kids as they grow. What I receive from FB is valuable to me and I know it is impossible to do it on that level through email. That’s just part of what I gain from using it wisely. I won’t go into the business networking.

  • #228239

    NYesq
    Member

    [/QUOTE]Or the ones that want their data being mined by Zucker and helping him get even richer. [/QUOTE]
    What do you have against rich folks?

  • #228246

    [QUOTE=Paulistano USA]Brazilians have some weird social networking habits and one is “collecting” friends as if he who has the highest friend count wins something at the end. [/QUOTE]
    That’s not just a Brazilian social networking habit, but seems to now be a world-wide obsession/FB phenomenon. I can’t help but wonder how many of one’s so-called ‘friends’ have actually been to one’s home for dinner (or even met out somewhere for dinner). Confused
    I recall how when it became permissible for someone without a college email address to sign up for FB, one friend of mine (who I’ve had dinner with many, many times) was sooooo excited because her college age daughter‘friended’ her. Whatever.
    But yes, for business, social networking is certainly a valuable tool.
    Yet other venues exist for this, other than the obnoxious ‘Look at ME everyone, I’m farting!’ FakeBook.
    Gringo.Floripa2012-12-01 12:35:24

  • #228253

    NYesq
    Member

    [QUOTE=Gringo.Floripa]
    But yes, for business, social networking is certainly a valuable tool.Yet other venues exist for this, other than the obnoxious ‘Look at ME everyone, I’m farting!’ FakeBook.
    [/QUOTE]
    This I can agree with. But you get out what you put in. If your friends are the, “Look at me……” type then that is what you get. If all you put into a computer is crap then that is all it is going to give you. Fortunately, my friends are of a higher calibre..well..most. And I happen to like getting a message telling me they are going to such and such a restaurant and even posting a photo of what they ordered. I can be there in spirit and yes, I love my friends that much.

  • #228255

    agri2001
    Participant

    [QUOTE=Rob Allen][/QUOTE]Or the ones that want their data being mined by Zucker and helping him get even richer. [/QUOTE]
    What do you have against rich folks?[/QUOTE]
    Nothing, its just that i do mind that they make money off my private data, obviously you do not have a problem with that, but each to his own.

  • #228314

    duncanich
    Member

    Thanks everyone! I thought it was kind of odd and that it was someone else to “check in” on me, since my privacy settings are set up like Fort Knox (due to my job). So, will ignore this guy’s request.
    But Facebook is a great way of keeping in touch w/ friends and family around the globe. It’s not just for adolescents.

  • #228325

    Anonymous

    Sorry about my ignorance (since I use neither), but:
    Is Orkut still more popular in Brazil than Facebook?
    Or do most Brazilians now prefer Facebook over Orkut?

  • #228606

    Anonymous

    I think Orkut is pretty much dead now….Incredible how fast the switch happened.

  • #230141

    Gilmour
    Member

    In the response to Facebook. I have it. I thought it was cool to connect with friends in Europe, the US, etc.. Now everytime I go in there I’m thinking “Those were great times, but where do they fit into my life today?” Kind of depressing…
    Mark f**kerberg would be wise to sell some of his shares.
    (So not cool.. this software ** when I wrote “Foockerberg”spongebob2012-12-17 11:31:39

  • #230166

    815
    Member

    [QUOTE=spongebob] In the response to Facebook. I have it. I thought it was cool to connect with friends in Europe, the US, etc.. Now everytime I go in there I’m thinking “Those were great times, but where do they fit into my life today?” Kind of depressing…
    [/QUOTE]
    WOW! You just put to words a thought I have had…yet never consciously known I’ve had. Uncanny.

  • #230213

    Gilmour
    Member

    I don’t even know that word Uncanny, in English, but I think I know what you mean.
    FB is a novelty, like a gringo that comes to Brazil. But after a while, nobody cares anymore. HEhehe, I like it that way!! Twitter? Don’t even go there! I don’t really care to know what people eat for breakfast or when they go to the bathroom!

  • #232622

    duncanich
    Member

    It’s not really a novelty.. Fbook has been around for more than 5 yrs. Maybe a novelty for most Brazilians who are abandoning Orkut..
    Twitter is annoying.. I agree w/ you on this one.. Who cares what you’re doing right now. It’s another forum for narcissistic people to talk about their otherwise normal, boring life.

  • #232640

    In 5 years, people will be saying about FB, “WTF wasI thinking?!?”

  • #232644

    jaenicoll
    Member

    [QUOTE=Gringo.Floripa] In 5 years, people will be saying about FB, “WTF wasI thinking?!?”
    [/QUOTE]
    I hope so but for the young bucks who grew up with it I am not so sure. As much as I hate it, and don’t even have it, I can understand how it is a useful communicative tool. Perhaps there will be a trend back to something where you are less exposed but I think social networking of this type is probably here to stay in some form.

  • #232647

    NYesq
    Member

    Exposed to whom? Just curious about your thoughts. I happen to enjoy it and find it a necessity. When you have many friends and family in many countries, it is easy to share photos, as an example. It is what you make it, I think.
    I’m no “young buck” either. Rob Allen2013-01-12 18:05:59

  • #232651

    Liliqtozin
    Member

    facebook … What do you show people? Isn’t most fun stuff still illegal? Don’t you risk alienating relatives, losing your job, getting kicked out of school, and being rejected by females if you don’t show yourself as some namby pamby geek?

  • #252164

    duncanich
    Member

    Hi all,
    here’s an update to this saga. I ended up adding the BFF and he turned out to be a blessing in disguise. The guy who I was dating was a pilot and was only in SP 1-2 days a week.
    I thought that the BFF was keeping tabs on me, but no, we just talked about politics and religion. Things with the pilot were rocky, as he’d start to get close to me and acting like a serious boyfriend, but then he’d start with this “I don’t want a commitment now” song & dance. We had 2 big fights about it, but we remained in the same “friends with benefits” stage til March when I gave him the cold shoulder. Didn’t talk to him for 2 months (I was in the US for one of those months) and when I came back, it was like he had changed. We went out every weekend, he was contacting me more than usual and then I met the BFF at a party. Pilot was very cuddly, kissy etc in front of the friend, too.
    At the party, I took a picture with the pilot and then I posted it on FB. He wrote a commentary “My American sister/Minha irmazinha americana” on the pic – and he never writes in PORT on my wall. I was flaming pissed and deleted the comment since it was obvious he wanted to send a message to me & someone else that there was NOTHING romantic going on at all. I sent a nasty text asking for an explanation and nothing. I had to call him 2 days later and got this “you’re so close to me that I feel like you’re my sister” excuse.
    And then I get the cold shoulder. But the BFF stepped in and told me not to jump ship yet. I guess the pilot went to see his BFF the day after the party and they discussed the idea of the pilot dating me. Since then, I’ve talked more to the BFF than the pilot. And BFF is telling me to hang on and be patient. Now mind you, I met this pilot 1 yr ago. If you don’t know in 12 months if you want to seriously date someone, well, then you don’t.
    I was getting ready to kick the pilot to the curb when out of the blue, the BFF asks me yesterday if I’d talked to the pilot. No. Turns out that he is on vacation and is hanging out in the NE w/ his “ficante”. And then today, there’s pictures of yet ANOTHER ‘ficante” and the pilot at a festa junina.. I ask the BFF what’s going on & this guy starts singing like a caged bird.
    Turns out this jerk was playing me big time. Has had 3 other girls (one ditched him when she figured out he was playing her) since we’ve started our friendship/hookup 1 yr ago. I was floored. So, I just deleted all of them from Facebook and my life. Wow. What a novela.
    Sorry, I just needed to vent. Soo pissed..
    KSaudades2013-06-22 14:34:34

  • #24015

    Sanohra
    Member

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