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  • #271616

    Rafamello
    Member

    Hi All, just joined and I am glad to have found this place, lots of information.

    I am currently very serious with a Brazilian girl, we are already married, but are planning a wedding next year. I have been feeling that she has been distant lately, and foolishly checked her facebook. I found the message below and was wondering if I am getting the wrong end of the stick using my limited brazilian and google translate? I love her very much, and I believe she loves me too. I know she is unhappy here for many reason where we live, not Brazil, and are discussing the possibilities to try and live in Brazil after the wedding.
    I’d appreciate any honesty and thoughts on the below message, to a guy I know she had a short and passionate relationship with in Brazil 3-4 years ago.

    Fico feliz em saber que estì° bem

    Acho que deverì≠amos ter tomado uma quando fui ao Brasil para bater um bom papo cabeìßa, mas deixa pra prì≥xima.

    Comigo estì° tudo em paz (atì© o inverno chegar, rs), virei gerente do cafì© onde trabalho, a grana ì© boa.. mas a satisfaìßao nem tanto. Tenho feito minhas viagens aqui e acolì° e sentido uma paz que a muito tempo vinha buscando.. Embora nem tudo esteja perfeito. Me caso em julho do ano que vem, com um cara massa, que me ensina o amor na simplicidade das coisas.

    a mina que voce quer virì°,

    mas tem que abrir esse peito, porra!!

    te vejo com alguì©m assim como voce, bicho solto..

    Ou o “ideal” seria alguem que te convencesse a ficar?

    Beijo, querido!

  • #271618

    Anonymous

    She said she’s marrying an awesome dude and I don’t see any flirtation with the person to whom she’s writing.

  • #271620

    Anonymous

    she’s giving him the old love-advice-so-you-can-find-the-person-you-deserve thing. Nothing but praise for you, and dissatisfaction with her job.

    Not that you asked, but if I were in your shoes I would try to have a respectful, nonjudgmental discussion about what’s getting her down, accept feelings, see what kind of solution/support you can offer, and keep moving. Checking FB and such, well, down that road lies madness.
  • #271621

    ffm
    Member

    +1 on the above posts! There is 0 flirtation with the person she is writing about and she says you are “massa” read, “awesome”.

    Are you a teenager by chance? LOL
  • #271622

    Rafamello
    Member

    Thanks guys, that’s put me at ease.
    We’ve been together 2 years and our sex life was amazing. However recently she has not wanted to have sex anymore. I found it odd and got paranoid, not a good thing, I should have taken her word that she’s stressed and just dealing with personal feelings. I regret checking and never have invaded her privacy before. And will not again.
    Thanks again

  • #271629

    lynchem
    Member

    Yes, it’s mostly about her job and absorbing her new life’s circumstances. I think from my experience you should focus on keeping her happy, not have expectations for her to figure it out. Perhaps, due to the similar sounding nature of your situation, I would suggest you be more involved. And maybe you’re busy but you still need time to help her. What I mean by help is that she’s out of her comfort zone (friends, family, good weather, culture et al). Leblon2014-11-13 15:24:36

  • #271631

    Anonymous

    True, all. And the signature “Beijo, querido!” means nothing either.
    She is just signing off with “A kiss, sweetie!” which is normal and done all the time in Brazil, to anyone, regardless of age or sex.

  • #271638

    celso
    Member

    The no sex part often kills the relationship. Moving to Brazil is another potential bomb.

  • #271641

    Rafamello
    Member

    To be honest my main concern was the two lines below.
    Acho que deverì≠amos ter tomado uma para bater um bom papo cabeìßa, mas deixa pra prì≥xima
    Which I thought may mean “we should have taken one when I was in Brazil, but next time” taken=sex
    And
    te vejo com alguì©m assim como voce, bicho solto..
    Ou o “ideal” seria alguem que te convencesse a ficar?
    I read: I see myself with someone like you, a wild beast. Or ideally I could convince you to stay?
    Which I seemed to be way off?
    Moving to Brazil will be last resort to be honest if she can’t be happy here. I’m willing to try if we cant succeed here, time will tell…

  • #271646

    Anonymous

    tomar uma — cerveja. should have had a beer and caught up, talked.

    and the other one- I see YOU with someone like you…….or maybe someone YOU could convince to stay.
    google translate will almost always screw you on the conjugations and pronouns.
  • #271647

    Marc Maserati
    Participant

    Don’t try to find meaning where there is none.

    -Marc
  • #271648

    Rafamello
    Member

    I know, thanks everyone.I feel ashamed for checking and getting angry over nothing. Learning Portuguese for the last couple of months, long way to go…
    We are very much in love, and the issues we’re having so seem to coincide with the time since she was made manager, she is very stressed and I should have respected that.

  • #271663

    jabomano
    Member

    [QUOTE=wellingtonleite]She said she’s marrying an awesome dude and I don’t see any flirtation with the person to whom she’s writing. [/QUOTE]
    I guess she’s just home sick, missing friends and family in Brazil while trying to adapt to a life and job in a different country and culture.
    Wink

  • #271672

    ejboyd
    Member

    “ex” have a way of ruining a relationship. there will always be a jealousy part in one way or another. I’m glad we have eliminated all our ex’s! this is, so we can avoid future arguments about people from the past. no problem with me and no problem with my spouse too. no contacts with any of them.

  • #271673

    ffm
    Member

    [QUOTE=Stellar] I’m glad we have eliminated all our ex’s! [/QUOTE]

    Oh my! Shocked
  • #271688

    ejboyd
    Member

    I meant from our lives, The Abbot! :P no contacts with any of them. and never will have any again.

  • #271703

    ffm
    Member

    [QUOTE=Stellar]I meant from our lives, The Abbot! :P no contacts with any of them. and never will have any again. [/QUOTE]

    LOL
    I was joking but I wrote a short story about a young jealous couple who went on a murder spree to kill all of the other’s exes. It was based on a crazy girlfriend that I had that had an irrational jealously for any who was in my life pre-her.
  • #271863

    ejboyd
    Member

    Haha that’s crazy! I hope I don’t get to that point LOLbut honestly, I think we’re more irritated by the fact that we had people from the past, than calling it “jealousy” :P but I’m just really glad we agreed what to do with that part.

  • #272183

    [QUOTE=TomYeti]To be honest my main concern was the two lines below.
    Acho que deverì≠amos ter tomado uma para bater um bom papo cabeìßa, mas deixa pra prì≥xima
    Which I thought may mean “we should have taken one when I was in Brazil, but next time” taken=sex
    [/quote]
    Well, not exactly. It means, “we should have drank [a beer?] so we could have had a great chat. Maybe next time.”
    [QUOTE=TomYeti]
    And
    te vejo com alguì©m assim como voce, bicho solto..
    [/quote]
    It doesn’t make a lot of sense on its own, but from the previous two lines, it seems that she’s just trying to cheer you up for not finding the girl you like.
    [QUOTE=TomYeti]
    Ou o “ideal” seria alguem que te convencesse a ficar?
    [/quote]
    “Maybe, ‘ideally’, there would be someone who would convince you to stay?”
    [QUOTE=TomYeti]
    I read: I see myself with someone like you, a wild beast. Or ideally I could convince you to stay?
    Which I seemed to be way off?
    [/quote]
    Again, it doesn’t make much sense. In order for that to be what you thought, the sentence would have to be something like, “Mevejo com alguì©m como vocì™, [uma] besta selvagem“. The way it is worded, it actually reads as, “I see you with someone like you, [a] loose beast..” It could be your girlfriend is not a good writer, but it actually sounds like Google Translate.
    [QUOTE=TomYeti]
    Moving to Brazil will be last resort to be honest if she can’t be happy here. I’m willing to try if we cant succeed here, time will tell…
    [/QUOTE]
    For whatever reason, the message implies that she doesn’t live in Brazil and that she wants you to stay wherever she is.
    Megabyte2014-12-28 12:31:03

  • #28037

    isakenfield
    Member

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