Dating ring custom in Brazil
Printed From: Gringoes.com
Category: Brazil
Forum Name: Romance
Forum Discription: Relationships in Brazil
URL: http://www.gringoes.com/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=11217
Printed Date: 19 June 2013 at 00:19
Software Version: Web Wiz Forums 8.05a - http://www.webwizforums.com
Topic: Dating ring custom in Brazil
Posted By: FlyingToaster
Subject: Dating ring custom in Brazil
Date Posted: 08 January 2011 at 16:43
| I am an American and have a girlfriend who is from and lives in Brazil. Recently she told me it's common for couples in Brazil to give dating rings. I didn't know about this, and this doesn't seem common in the US, at least among adults. I know dating rings signify that one is dating and not available to others, but I am interested in more information about the custom of dating rings in Brazil - For instance, do both people in the couple exchange dating rings? What exactly does the dating ring signify and mean? Is there anything else I should know? |
Replies:
Posted By: Ferguson21
Date Posted: 08 January 2011 at 18:42
| It's custom only for girls who are dating gringoes; they buy everything. A real man sends his wife working and plays snooker all day long. |
Posted By: DUNGA
Date Posted: 08 January 2011 at 18:53
------------- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u8hLc_nqx8g - Tales of Brave Ulysses |
Posted By: agri2001
Date Posted: 08 January 2011 at 19:13
Spot on , on both counts. But I would say save your money on the ring and buy some beers with it. ------------- Athiests are moral, they don't kill over religion. |
Posted By: FlyingToaster
Date Posted: 08 January 2011 at 19:19
Responses like these sound like sarcasm.. I'd appreciate some sincere answers. |
Posted By: Ferguson21
Date Posted: 08 January 2011 at 19:26
| Sincere: buy her a ring. It's completely normal for a gringo. Maybe it's better to send her money to buy the ring she deserves. Ask her. |
Posted By: ptic
Date Posted: 09 January 2011 at 10:56
Good one ...  and true as well.Don´t buy her a ring. Dating ring - bollocks. Just about the stupidest thing I´ve ever heard. Save your money and get few paints instead. ------------- Jaz sem ptica selivka |
Posted By: DM22
Date Posted: 09 January 2011 at 16:08
|
If she feels it as important why not, especially if you are in an LDR http://pt.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alian%C3%A7a_%28anel%29#Alian.C3.A7a_de_compromisso Anel de compromisso ou aliança de compromisso é um anel de prata utilizado por casais de namorados no http://pt.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brasil - Brasil , e cada vez mais utilizado em outros países, como Portugal, Argentina e outros, para demonstrar fidelidade e seriedade do namoro. Alguns casais, após completar certo tempo de http://pt.wikipedia.org/wiki/Namoro - namoro , optam por trocar alianças de prata, conhecidas como alianças de compromisso ou anéis de compromisso. É uma forma de demonstrar que o namoro é sério, embora no momento ainda não tenham a intenção de se casar. A aliança do homem tem o nome da mulher e a data do início do namoro gravada e vice versa. Alguns preferem gravar os dois nomes em ambas, seguidos da data. Alianças de compromisso são usadas no dedo anelar da mão direita e, na ocasião do noivado, substituídas pelas alianças de noivado. ------------- The info on this site is too good to check!! |
Posted By: GreatBallsoFire
Date Posted: 10 January 2011 at 00:32
Never, not once in over thirty years has a woman in Brazil asked for a dating ring. Last year a lovely woman in Recife asked for cab fare in the morning to go home.  I gave her three times the amount requested. I guess she could buy a few "dating rings."------------- Simia quam similis, turpissimus bestia nobis. Oi amigo, pode trazer a saideira? |
Posted By: agri2001
Date Posted: 10 January 2011 at 04:23
That cab fare request seems to be the norm in these parts of the woods. I wonder if they have some sort of a congress where they get together and formulate different ways on how to separate us from our moneys. On the dating ring thingy, I remember that it was a normal thing to do back when I was in junior high, but not a common practice in today`s world. ------------- Athiests are moral, they don't kill over religion. |
Posted By: nikkij12185
Date Posted: 10 January 2011 at 10:44
The only time Ive seen "dating rings" here was in similar situations - ie 15year olds dating other 15 year olds that live in different parts of the city or different cities and met on orkut. For grown-ups in Brazil both the guy and the girl where engagement rings on the right hand and then switch it to the left for marriage, and they're usually made of gold. Be careful with this girl and your thoughts about moving for her. Either she is immature or she's already trying to rake you over the coals. |
Posted By: sven
Date Posted: 10 January 2011 at 11:06
I think it was Reginaldo Rossi who said that he who has a beautiful wife should share her with others  ------------- We live in an age when unnecessary things are our only necessities. ~Oscar Wilde |
Posted By: sven
Date Posted: 10 January 2011 at 11:08
Been here for 15 years. Can't say I have seen that "custom" too much. It's usually a white gold or silver band, like a wedding ring. Not too common though, that may have triggered the sarcasm. ------------- We live in an age when unnecessary things are our only necessities. ~Oscar Wilde |
Posted By: sven
Date Posted: 10 January 2011 at 11:13
I once, when asked for cab fare, gave bus fare only. Never saw her again ------------- We live in an age when unnecessary things are our only necessities. ~Oscar Wilde |
Posted By: sven
Date Posted: 10 January 2011 at 11:15
Engagement rings take things to a whole other level. Silver/Platinum bands say "we're together in a nice relationship" Gold says "we're close to ruining a perfectly good relationship by getting married". Biiiigggg difference. ------------- We live in an age when unnecessary things are our only necessities. ~Oscar Wilde |
Posted By: GiovanniRio
Date Posted: 10 January 2011 at 18:04
| Bottom line... In all experience a dating ring is NOT common in Brazil. It can look nice to her... but that's about it :) |
Posted By: DM22
Date Posted: 10 January 2011 at 20:07
|
It's gotta be common somewhere in Brazil or within certain groups of people, like religious ppl. Anyhow wikipedia doesnt say it is popular but it is a custom that exists among brazilians and they may follow or not. None of my concern to pass a judgment on ppls needs thou. ------------- The info on this site is too good to check!! |
Posted By: DM22
Date Posted: 11 January 2011 at 09:37
|
Popular or not, many if not most ppl in Br will recognize a silver band as a committment ring or wonder if it has a meaning. ------------- The info on this site is too good to check!! |
Posted By: MovingSoon
Date Posted: 11 January 2011 at 10:17
Are we now in high school?? ------------- Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave with a well preserved body, but to skid in sideways at a high rate of speed, drink in one hand, totally worn out shouting, "Whoa, what a ride"! |
Posted By: Olly86
Date Posted: 11 January 2011 at 10:26
|
dating rings are custom for girls who want their boyfriend to buy them a ring. i'm getting married and i'm not even getting a wedding ring. ------------- Orr was crazy and could be grounded. All he had to do was ask; and as soon as he did, he would no longer be crazy and would have to fly more missions. |
Posted By: andrewfroboy
Date Posted: 11 January 2011 at 11:39
| i know a lot of people with dating rings, my brother in law uses one with his girlfriend, they piss me off because wearing a tungsten ring in Brasil can look like a dating ring and not a wedding band, in the US anything on your left ring finger means you're married, apparently not in brasil |
Posted By: DM22
Date Posted: 12 January 2011 at 08:05
A ring brings a lot of things. Don't you think that your behavior show some level of ambivalence towards your relationship or partner? ------------- The info on this site is too good to check!! |
Posted By: andrewfroboy
Date Posted: 12 January 2011 at 09:29
| no, dating rings in fact devalue a real engagement/wedding ring, if you respect your girl you wouldn't get her a ring until you're ready to commit, the whole point of a ring is to say it is forever, i have a bit of a person crusade against dating rings, worst idea ever |
Posted By: sven
Date Posted: 12 January 2011 at 10:07
The dating ring is sortof a commitment. It's like saying "untill we do us part" instead of "untill death do us part" ------------- We live in an age when unnecessary things are our only necessities. ~Oscar Wilde |
Posted By: andrewfroboy
Date Posted: 12 January 2011 at 10:30
| its a commitment that i'm with you till i find someone better |
Posted By: andrewfroboy
Date Posted: 12 January 2011 at 10:32
| course unfortunately marriage has turned into that too nowadays... |
Posted By: sven
Date Posted: 12 January 2011 at 10:42
Isn't that always true ? ------------- We live in an age when unnecessary things are our only necessities. ~Oscar Wilde |
Posted By: andrewfroboy
Date Posted: 12 January 2011 at 10:56
| call me old fashioned but i'm a believer in "till death do us part", if that isn't the case, why bother with marriage, the whole point of marriage is that it is forever, if that isn't the idea why waste your time (and money)? |
Posted By: DM22
Date Posted: 12 January 2011 at 11:02
I was talking about the weeding ring. But if a couple wears the dating ring it means that they are heading to marriage still they arent prepared to it (money, studies etc). ------------- The info on this site is too good to check!! |
Posted By: ptic
Date Posted: 12 January 2011 at 11:15
Isn´t that one called the engagement ring ... ------------- Jaz sem ptica selivka |
Posted By: sven
Date Posted: 12 January 2011 at 11:21
The dating ring means they are heading to engagement but aren't prepared for it ------------- We live in an age when unnecessary things are our only necessities. ~Oscar Wilde |
Posted By: Esprit
Date Posted: 12 January 2011 at 11:27
|
What about an ‘I’m available ring – will consider any carbon life-form with a pulse’? ------------- Esprit |
Posted By: DM22
Date Posted: 12 January 2011 at 11:29
I'm not saying ppl should have dating rings I 'm just saying if it's valid to some what's the drama judgment. I find it cute for young couples. In Br there's just one ring which is switched when the union materializes. I find the diamond ring excessive. ------------- The info on this site is too good to check!! |
Posted By: sven
Date Posted: 12 January 2011 at 12:17
- any - ???  ------------- We live in an age when unnecessary things are our only necessities. ~Oscar Wilde |
Posted By: andrewfroboy
Date Posted: 12 January 2011 at 15:32
| Diamond rings are very much a rite of passage in the US, i get why others don't like them and why they are a bit of a marketing scheme, but there is something to be said for saving up money to sort of prove you are serious about a person. Chicks dig diamonds because it means security, most dudes won't drop serious money on a girl they don't care about. To me a ring you paid 20 reais for doesn't really mean much, except that you want to get in a girl's pants and you think thats a good way to get there. |
Posted By: sven
Date Posted: 12 January 2011 at 15:50
|
I don't see why dropping 20K on a ring shows commitment.
I know a guy that bought a hooker a diamond ring once, just because he liked her services so much. No commitment whatsoever. To me, if you give a chick a 20K diamond ring, you either won't miss the 20K (your name is Donald Trump or something) or you're stupid (you could spend the 20K on a new kitchen, showing the same amount of commitment while also showing you like her cooking)
Diamond rings are indeed a shrewd marketing scheme. Diamond cutters are very happy with this new american "tradition". A ring is a symbol that in itself shows commitment as the circle does not have an end. They should be gold, not to make them expensive, but because gold is everlasting. ------------- We live in an age when unnecessary things are our only necessities. ~Oscar Wilde |
Posted By: DM22
Date Posted: 12 January 2011 at 15:55
Hey andrewfroboy And I understand why you repel a silver ring but if you think about a young couple or ppl apart who are working their asses off through studies career development commitment to gettin to know each other to eventually marry in the future, the image could be more sympathetic. The whole thing is the silver ring is acknowleged in Brazil whether the "mainstream" superego like it or not. ------------- The info on this site is too good to check!! |
Posted By: Olly86
Date Posted: 12 January 2011 at 16:15
I think spending 18month apart, working solidly for those 18month, spending little, whilst also attaining a certificate in tefl and working as a voluntary teacher for experience so I could get a job in Brazil and live with my partner says more than a bloody ring. I find the whole ring thing pointless, as does my partner. Neither of us wear rings, nor do I see her as 'my property' who needs to have a 'already taken' sign on her hand wherever she goes. Now don't get me started on engagement rings. But no, I don't think it shows a certain level of ambivalence. It shows that I don't like rings much. ------------- Orr was crazy and could be grounded. All he had to do was ask; and as soon as he did, he would no longer be crazy and would have to fly more missions. |
Posted By: Esprit
Date Posted: 12 January 2011 at 16:15
|
Having seen that movie with that ugly born critter coveting a gold ring and calling it “My precious” with its pervey voice, the idea of gold rings have lost their lustre for me. I find the idea of a dating ring to be quite childish and smacks of insecurity. It would be more pragmatic to buy her a sex toy for those lonely nights when apart. ------------- Esprit |
Posted By: Olly86
Date Posted: 12 January 2011 at 16:19
 ------------- Orr was crazy and could be grounded. All he had to do was ask; and as soon as he did, he would no longer be crazy and would have to fly more missions. |
Posted By: sven
Date Posted: 12 January 2011 at 16:23
------------- We live in an age when unnecessary things are our only necessities. ~Oscar Wilde |
Posted By: andrewfroboy
Date Posted: 12 January 2011 at 16:33
| Huge difference between dropping 20K on a ring and 2K, mine was closer to the latter. As for dating rings, call it an engagement ring if you can't afford a gold one, but honestly engagement rings (gold bands) cost like R$ 1000 or less, if you can't afford that then you aren't ready for the commitment of marriage or just call your silver ring an engagement ring. My point is that it is stupid that the color or cost of the ring is a factor, any ring on your ring finger should be an engagement ring or wedding band, whether it be made of plastic or platinum. No reason to call it a dating ring, that is just for men that give into their girls desires for commitment and a ring, but aren't really ready yet. Rings should be for engagement and marriage only, but obviously people can disagree with me on that. |
Posted By: agri2001
Date Posted: 12 January 2011 at 19:03
You may invest in the sex toy but more then likely she will be using the real thing on those lonely nights when apart ------------- Athiests are moral, they don't kill over religion. |
Posted By: ptic
Date Posted: 12 January 2011 at 20:41
|
Oh yes all those rings, dating ring, engagement ring, wedding ring. What else will you come up with. By the time I´m married I´ll be completely broke.
------------- Jaz sem ptica selivka |
Posted By: Esprit
Date Posted: 12 January 2011 at 22:00
The pragmatism also indicates fidelity; if she doesn’t ask for replacement batteries then you know she’s been unfaithful. Quod erat demonstrandum. Bitches be crazy.  ------------- Esprit |
Posted By: DM22
Date Posted: 17 January 2011 at 14:23
|
Noivado (engagement) is rather outdated in the metropolitan areas as I see it. I understand that ppl become noivos as soon as they plan their marriage. But no anel de noivado or engagement ring is exchanged for most ppl! ------------- The info on this site is too good to check!! |
Posted By: Ferguson21
Date Posted: 17 January 2011 at 15:31
| Most Brazilians rings end up flying. Ever heard of Brazilian temper? |
Posted By: WENGER
Date Posted: 03 February 2012 at 12:29
The whole point of marriage is: a) You don't want to be lonely and do not have such money like Charlie Sheen to keep paying for company. b) Her sister's getting married, her friends already got married and she must keep up with the competition. c) And when your wife runs away with your beloved kids, you can die and reborn again |
Posted By: WENGER
Date Posted: 03 February 2012 at 12:33
Regarding the rings: Yes silver or silver with golden stripes ring is alliança de namoro, but once you buy them, she will start calling you noivo or esposo (fiance or husband) |
Posted By: mc_carol1
Date Posted: 03 February 2012 at 21:41
| If she asked for one, you should get her one. I dont care about rings, I'm married and I don't veen have one, but for some girls it is really important. Like other members said here, you should get her a silver one, not golden one. Silver ones only mean that you are dating someone. Golden rings mean that you are engaged. And yes, dating rings are really commom in Brasil. |
Posted By: sven
Date Posted: 04 February 2012 at 07:55
Once you buy them is when the 50% clock starts ticking if you don't pay enough attention.....
|
Posted By: Isa26
Date Posted: 05 February 2012 at 08:42
I agree with you,but it also depends on how much you earn,I mean if the guy only earns 300 reais (possible in Brazil) and gives a 200 reais ring,he saved up for that.
About the dating ring,I have nothing against it,and don't think it necesarrily means that you aren't serious about that person,maybe they just haven't come to a point where they realize they want to get married.
|
Posted By: Isa26
Date Posted: 05 February 2012 at 08:50
lmao
She can't show off a sex toy,that's the point.
|
Posted By: Isa26
Date Posted: 05 February 2012 at 09:09
lol.So that many others can find them in the streets?Never had that kind of luck
 |
Posted By: WENGER
Date Posted: 06 February 2012 at 06:56
Yes, I have learned my lesson with my ex from Bahia. Remember that every girl here got at least 20 years of Globo-telenovelas training in drama and yelling. The secret is when she starts yelling, you must yell more the she does. If you take a WUSSY eu/usa gentle approach, you will lose respect and you are dead meat then. You must show her You are the Alfa/macho man that she wants. BTW, this was a $1,000,000 advice for free... |
Posted By: frank4000
Date Posted: 07 February 2012 at 14:09
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@Wenger well said. ------------- Meu Vizinho Jogou um semente no seu quintal |
Posted By: justafriend
Date Posted: 08 February 2012 at 13:12
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Yes it is normal to use a dating ring in Brazil...It is silver and cheap...so unlike the prejudiced comments I read here, I can say that a Brazilian woman can ask you a dating ring only as a symbol of love and your relationship. I may agree with those who said that usually younger people use it, but it is not a so unusual thing for older people as described here.
------------- Respect to be Respected... |
Posted By: cobrakhan5
Date Posted: 08 February 2012 at 13:18
| Yeah its all about symbolism. Women want security,..... if you care about her and it makes her feel more secure then why not do it? Now if she is in it for the money I would think their would be other indications, like I want a "diamond" dating ring or ...... if she indicated she wanted a certain type of ring "expensive".... and if you have to second guess her motivation and their is no trust.... sounds like we have bigger issues to deal with then if to buy a dating ring or not. Key here is understanding your woman....... which is a life long process =) |
Posted By: Floriano
Date Posted: 23 February 2012 at 14:23
I agree with this statement. If you are a real man gringo though you should have your woman under control already - Mine is out working all day while I sit at home studying the internet. ------------- “He who has a WHY to live can bear almost any HOW.” Friedrich Nietzsche |
Posted By: Floriano
Date Posted: 23 February 2012 at 14:24
I totally agree with this statement as well. Do you buy a whore a ring? Is there like a ring you buy a whore and give her before you spend the next hour with her? No? Well that's your answer. ------------- “He who has a WHY to live can bear almost any HOW.” Friedrich Nietzsche |
Posted By: Jully
Date Posted: 04 April 2012 at 03:07
|
The thing is that people in Brazil usually get engaged only when everything is pretty much already set for the wedding. There isn't really a big tradition of "popping the question" in a grand romantic gesture. Getting engaged is usually a discussed and agreed upon thing, which, thinking about it, it's not that romantic ;)
Commitment rings, usually made of silver, are somewhat common. I think it started as something that teenagers did to show they where serious about each other, sorta like giving a girl your class ring in the US. As these teens got older, I guess they just kept on doing it. ;) There's no set time for exchanging these rings, but I would say the relationship should probably be close to a year old or more. |
Posted By: Megabyte
Date Posted: 04 April 2012 at 03:51
Dating / commitment rings ("anéis de compromisso,") as people said here, are used when you're dating someone for a while and the relationship is starting to get serious. It's a very recent habit. Considering that, you should only give one to her if you consider your relationship something serious – this kind of ring doesn't mean you intend to marry her, though. Not that it matters – as we've discussed in another topic, if you two decide to live together, our law considers it as a "stable union," which grants you the same rights and obligations of a real marriage. If you do decide to buy her a ring, you can safely give her a silver ring – silver is not expensive here. You can get a reasonably nice silver ring for as low as $10.00, so you'll spend $20.00 for a pair. Take a look here: http://www.pratafina.com.br/aliancas?gclid=CJvZirDKmq8CFQqc7QodO3G-aw - http://www.pratafina.com.br/aliancas?gclid=CJvZirDKmq8CFQqc7QodO3G-aw |
Posted By: cara0910
Date Posted: 04 April 2012 at 13:16
forever? you must not know about the number of marriages that are forever unfaithful or forever until divorce...
|
Posted By: andrewfroboy
Date Posted: 04 April 2012 at 13:38
| Well, the idea is forever, I think dating rings just further devalue the concept of marriage being permanent, i may be old school, but I am a firm believer in until death do us part, otherwise what is the point of marriage, why not just cohabitate? |
Posted By: Megabyte
Date Posted: 04 April 2012 at 14:22
Cohabitating in Brazil is becoming quite common nowadays. My sister has been doing this for quite a while with her husband, and things so far are quite well. Cohabitating in Brazil has the same effect of a legal marriage after a while, anyway. |
Posted By: cara0910
Date Posted: 06 April 2012 at 00:05
She means it breaks up the relationship.
|
Posted By: Brelett
Date Posted: 06 April 2012 at 21:44
|
My girlfriend mentioned it to me when things started to be more serious between us. At first I thought it was just something she said to trick me into an engagement or whatever.
But when I got here, I saw that her sister and his boyfriend has it (she is 22 and he is 26, I think). Dont know how common it really is here though. Maybe I´ll buy her one before I go back to Norway if it makes her happy. |
Posted By: Megabyte
Date Posted: 06 April 2012 at 21:54
It's fashionable nowadays. Only buy her a ring if you plan to come back, though. Otherwise, buying this kind of ring is quite inexpensive, so I don't see a problem. |
Posted By: Amsterdam
Date Posted: 04 May 2012 at 00:16
She doesnt want you dating any other girls she wants you to be faithful to her and to show that you want that also. (That would be the sincere reason.) She also wants the ring to repell other women from you, she must like you alot, becareful though. If thats what you want, then wear the ring and she wears a ring also. But i have never heard of this but if you like her then wear the ring. It could also be a status thing also, something to show off to her family and friends..Look what he bought me. You never know with some girls. If she is asking you to buy her things and its early in the relationship, i would cool down a little aswell. Maybe she has never been given a ring before either. |
Posted By: Squiddie
Date Posted: 29 May 2012 at 13:11
|
My namorada put a ring on her finger and when I came she gave me one (with some trepidation if I would accept wearing it.) She had unilaterally pronounced me her "marido" starting from few months into our relationship.
In most cases I think the recommendation is to be cautious if the woman pressures you into a marriage. In this case, she just loves to exchange words and signs of commitment. An actual marriage ceremony isn't really what she had ever asked or even fantasized about. But then, in Brazil, we always need to be mindful of the common-law marriage (união estavel) which might bind us sooner than we want to. See my other 2 threads on união estavel and alimony under Getting Married for more on that. |
Posted By: tamte
Date Posted: 29 May 2012 at 16:46
Yep, few months just living under the same roof and you are legally like "married". ------------- life's too short to be living without you, babe. |
Posted By: frank4000
Date Posted: 29 May 2012 at 20:53
|
yes here it is 2 years ------------- Meu Vizinho Jogou um semente no seu quintal |
Posted By: Squiddie
Date Posted: 29 May 2012 at 22:20
Well, união estavel is not really related to 2 years at all by any law (it was once 5, but since novo Codigo Civil there is no more any minimum duration), it just has to be durable and continuous living together, etc. with some restrictions, etc. I believe I was not in one, until now, but now I have to make precautions. I am just working on my dissertation  on this over on the Getting Married section.
However, with my girl, the ring was a purely emotional thing. She is not after any legal scheme. Of course she would like me to take care of her and take care of me going forward. We're still in the middle of figuring it out. |
Posted By: frank4000
Date Posted: 30 May 2012 at 02:13
|
cool ------------- Meu Vizinho Jogou um semente no seu quintal |